Sometimes I envision what an earlier version of myself would think about my present life. We talk sometimes.
13-years-earlier Alisha: You don't look as sexy as me, but better than I feared you would. And you're getting Mom's bottom.
15-years-earlier Alisha: Instead of singing to this country song, you should be throwing up. You disgust me.
8-years-earlier Alisha: You made that!?! When did I learn to do that? Good job!
5-years-earlier Alisha: Listen, I know you feel a little frazzled, but you need to figure out how to keep the house cleaner. This is unacceptable. We were not going to be this kind of housekeeper.
Today's conversation was with 7-years-earlier-Alisha
7-years-earlier Alisha: What you looking at?
Present-Alisha: Houses in Vegas, this is depressing. Why are the homes so strange looking? What are they doing with the drywall art? Why are all the walls covered with speckles?
7: I hadn't noticed how ugly it was, but now that you point it out, you're right it is ugly.
Present: And I'm not looking forward to rocks and cactus in my yard. I think I can help it with drought resistant flowers, but still seems impossible to make the desert look like a garden. Will I miss Nashville forever?
7: No, because you've moved a ton of times, and it's always the people that make the place and there are cool people in Vegas.
Present: Will the cool people make up for me living in a house that has windows that aren't trimmed out, and zero personality design, and those horribly unimaginative bathrooms and kitchens that all look identical, and carpet, and 2 inch baseboards?
Pause.
7: Are you serious? Are you that much of a princess? Since when have I needed baseboards to be happy? You need to do charity work until you're less selfish. I can't believe we're even talking about this. You know what, little whiny princess you need to take off your tutu and put on your boxing gloves. Right now.
So I did. And we punched each other. And I felt better.
Thank goodness she knocked some sense into me.
9 comments:
This sounds all too familiar.
Bratty Me: "I am 30 years old and share a bathroom with my entire family! I shouldn't be sharing a bathroom with this many people, most of whom are children!"
Less Bratty Me: "The majority of the people on this planet share a one room home with three generations of family and poop in a hole in the ground. Snap out of it, you ungrateful, entitled American!"
Me for the last 2 years: "Holy moly Sarah, when are you going to learn to sew/cook/create/build like your sisters-in-law?! Your current skills are what we call an 'epic fail.' Daaaang, girl, you better get ON that. Mmm-mmm-mmm."
I need to just dig up your email address. Ok, how much did it cost to do the couch? Chad just isn't on board so I need to present a more clear plan rather than "I want to recover the couch" Any other tips? Are you coming to UT this summer?
HAHAHAHA I am laughing so hard I might cry.
But word to present Alisha: heck no. We are going to have amazing, innovative, non-cookie cutter- Vegasy-deserty-puke-colored houses with large windows and even large baseboards if you so desire.
And forest trees. I know because Paul showed me his water box ideas.
So there. Put your tiara back on. =)
You're moving to Vegas? Mike went to pre-grad at UNLV. We loved it! Our ward was great, our neighbours were great! It may be really hot but they have a whole lot of water parks the kids will love. Mike and I also use to sneak into the awesome hotel pools like the Mandalay Bay(this was before we became "responsible" parents).
Well good luck and have fun. Aren't you the one that use to always say "suck it up princess"???
;)
Move here! Move here! Move here! We have ways of making bleak style-less Las Vegas cool and garden-able and edgy and a HAPPY home for you Alisha! I shall happily support this cause with you!
(and mainly sit around trying to learn all of your skills!)
When is this happening? What part of town are you searching?
This is exactly how I feel at the mention of going back there. Could you knock some sense into me? Dusty would appreciate it.
Oh Alisha, I do love you. Nashville has completely spoiled me from Vegas but don't tell that to Steven. Even though you may have to have a rock garden molded into a desert scene, at least you can have a beautiful pool and grill out every night except for Christmas. And I'll come visit you whenever I come home to visit my parents :). Oh, and 2 AMAZING things about Vegas- In'N'Out and Cafe Rio.
oh lish. you are such a nut case. love you and miss you sooo much.
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